April and May

April went by in a flash. Half of May went by in a flash. In truth, this period of time is not enjoyable. So much uncovering, so much testing, so much failure. So much so that i don’t think i am anywhere near what i have been called to do. Where i imagine myself to be is not where i am at. I wrestle with myself on the inside, that i may find strength to continue running the race, even when i don’t feel like running anymore.

Or that maybe this moment is just one of those passing moment where i feel so overwhelmed by my struggles. And i know this too will pass. Everything will be okay. He remains faithful. I will be okay.

Although April and this May sucked, i know 2017 is still the year of the Lord’s goodness.
I pray my eyes will be opened to see the goodness of the Lord everywhere. In the little things, that is where i will find goodness. In the Lord of the heavens, that is where i will find goodness.

I need to depend on God. I may say i do depend on God but i guess there is still a part of me that wants to make sure I’ve got everything done well and perfect, then i can go to God. But i also know that God wants me to depend on Him. Fully. To be fully dependent on who He is.

And i speak to my soul, be still.

Be still in His presence. Be still and know that He is God.

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